Tall Gladiator Heels ($39.80)

Rating: Buy it never

Fit: Forever 21 says these shoes feature “multiple elastic straps that zip all the way up and fit super snug.” The first part is true. They do feature elastic straps, which look like stirrups lining your calves. Not so hot. At first, it was so hard to zip up the sandals that I thought my skin was going to get caught in the hardware. Then it was the exact opposite. Granted, I have thinner claves. But if you have thicker calves, matters are only worse. The elastic will make your legs look liked stuffed sausages. It’s a lose-lose situation.

Versatility: Even Rihanna was only able to wear her Balenciaga knee-high gladiators a few times. Translation? They’re not versatile.

Trend Factor: Last year, these shoes were supertrendy with everyone from Mary-Kate Olsen to Jennifer Connelly making men cringe (the male race doesn’t exactly think knee-high gladiators are sexy).  Now I personally think they’re old news but even if you still want a pair, Forever 21’s are not a wise choice.

Demographic: Nobody

Pleated Satin Mini Skirt ($15.80)

Rating: Buy it never

Fit: The satin is even crinkled in the picture shown on the website. That’s never a good sign. It means the garment is going to look cheap… which this one most certainly does.

Versatility: Don’t even bother. Get the Satin Jacquard Skirt instead for the same price without the creases.

Trend Factor: Zero.

Demographic: Nobody

Belted Halter Dress ($44)

Rating: Buy it never

Fit: I appreciate Twelve by Twelve’s effort. I really do. From afar, and I’m talking all the way across the store, this dress looks uber chic. Then you get closer and the disappointment kicks in. But still, you want to try it on because a belted, bustier dress like this at Saks would set you back a week’s worth of salary. But all hope is lost in the fitting room. The halter strap is too thick, the padded bust too reminiscent of Madonna’s Blonde Ambition tour and the skirt makes you look like you regained the Freshman 15 you never wanted to see again. Fail.

Versatility: The jewels on the belt are pretty? Ya, not much else here.

Trend Factor: With the 80s back in fashion, peplum is huge again—but you need the bottom skirt to be more fitted to avoid looking huge. And Jean Paul Gaultier resurrected his infamous cone bras for spring. But that doesn’t mean you need to wear them.

Demographic: Nobody.

Boyfriend Straight Jean ($29.80)

Fit: Usually we don’t review jeans–there are just too many and they really fit everyone so differently. However, I hold this particular pair of jean largely responsible for all the frump that was going on when I tried on Love 21 Contemporary’s tops. I should have ran out and grabbed another pair of jeans for the fitting room but I hate leaving the a dressing room on a busy day when there’s a line. It’s like I’m rubbing it everyone’s faces, “I have a room and another round of six items to try on plus whatever else I’m grabbing now and you’re just going to have to stand there and watch!” So I kept this pair of jeans on for all my tops and they really did add instant frump to everything. Also, the length was weird. Unrolled they only went down to my ankles. And on top of all that the lighter wash is not going to help in the slimming department.

Versatility: As you can tell, I really kinda hate these jeans which makes coming up with different ways to wear them rather difficult.

Trend Factor: The whole look is very Katie Holmes 2008.

Demographic: Nobody

Printed Ruffled Top ($29.00)

Rating: Buy It Never

Fit: So this great if you really want to look like a bird of paradise. It’s probably not slutty enough for Halloween so it can be used just on normal costumey days should you have such days. The weirdest part about this dress might be the back that is also decked out in ruffles. This is perfect because from the side with crazy ruffles in the front and back, you’ll look twice as bulky as usual and who doesn’t want to look like that? Well done, designers.

Versatility: Tiki night? It would make an acceptable alternative to a Hawaiian shirt.

Trend: Whatever the look is they’re going for here, it’s not for fall. That much I know.

Demographic: Nobody

Dimensional Belted Skirt ($28.00)

Rating: Buy it never

Fit: Never mind that the skirt was overly poofy and the belt reminded me of Avril Lavigne, who certainly isn’t my fashion icon. But my biggest issue with this skirt is why on earth would anyone want a horizontal stripe running across their butt? It’s as if the lines are saying, “Watch out! Wide load coming through.” To be fair, I only saw the grey one. On black, the piping isn’t so obvious, but the poof factor remains.

Versatility: It could make a cool pillowcase if you have a sewing machine lying around.

Trend Factor: Piping is meant to add a decorative element or highlight the areas you want to show. It’s not made to make your butt look big.

Demographic: Nobody

Side Swept Pleat Skirt ($17.80)

Rating: Buy it never

Fit: The word disappointed doesn’t even cut it. Jen and I have been trying to go to Pasadena so we can review Forever 21’s contemporary line, Love 21 for months now. Tired of waiting I ordered this skirt when I bought my two new pairs of booties online since I had to spend $75 to get free shipping. On a side note, the package came literally a day after I placed my order. Too bad the skirt wasn’t as impressive as the shipping. Just look at the way it puckers at the seams and widens the hips with the thick banded waist. The booties on the other hand? Love.

Versatility: Aside from being poorly constructed, this skirts creases like crazy. You might look halfway decent when you step out of the house, but after sitting down for an hour you’ll be a crinkled mess—and not in that cool Prada way.

Trend Factor: Yes, tulips skirts are in through next season. But Prada’s crinkled creations were last season. And unflattering fits are never in style.

Demographic: Nobody. And fingers crossed the skirt doesn’t represent the entire Love 21 line.

Chiffon Pleat Wool Dress ($22.80)

Rating: Buy it never

Fit: This dress is part of Forever’s Twist collection, which has the most adorable bull dog label. I wanted to like this dress just because of the label—and because you can never have enough LBDs. But when I tried it on, something was off. It was another waist problem. The trim was placed too high, making it impossible not to look short-waisted. Plus, the wool isn’t exactly comfy cozy.

Versatility: You could button a cardigan over the dress to hide the waist issue but then you’d lose the adorable chiffon neckline. So you’re better off with this dress. It’s much more slimming.

Trend Factor: A LBD never goes out of style. But looking short-waisted is never in style.

Demographic: Nobody

Belted Pencil Skirt ($15.80)

Rating: Buy It Never

Fit: I wasn’t there when Sydne tried on the Simple Knit Skirt, which is a similar black pencil skirt, but I’m going to have to recommend buying that over this rayon version. Knit is typically more forgiving (unlike this version) plus it’s not going to pucker at seams like this one. Oh! And on top of all that, the knit one comes belt-free so you’re never tempted to just throw on that red atrocity for a pop or color or whatever. One last thing for the pro-kint column–it’s $8 cheaper.

Versatility: Everyone knows black skirts go with everything.

Trend Factor: Pencil skirts are one of those timeless classics that never go out of style, just you know, not this version.

Demographic: Nobody

Atomic Faux Leather Skirt ($19.80)

Rating: Buy it Never

Fit: I’m always a fan of pockets and I usually like pleats. But not when they make the skirt poof out. From the side, it looked like I had a penis.

Versatility: Tranny Halloween costume?

Trend Factor: Leather skirts are an easy way to do the rocker look for fall. But I suggest going with the skort instead. I never would have thought those words would come out of my mouth.

Demographic: Nobody.